The Black Flamingo by Dean Atta takes flight!

 

Originally, this post was meant to be the first book in a fantasy trilogy. The post is all written and ready to go, but I have the most basic aesthetic that I’m currently trying to follow on my Instagram and if I posted the fantasy book, I wouldn’t be able to have the whole trilogy on the same background like I want, so I’ve decided to put it off for a couple of posts, and the first book that has moved up the line is The Black Flamingo by Dean Atta. This has been one of those books that I’d always look at in shops and think that the cover was pretty, but never picked up, and I finally got it after finding an old gift card to a bookshop.

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The old Blurbman Munster says that “This is not about being ready, it’s not even about being fierce, or fearless, it’s about being free.” It then goes on to say that Michael waits in the stage wings wearing a pink wig, pink fluffy coat and black heels, and that one more step will see him illuminated in the spotlight. He has been on a journey of bravery to be who he is, and questions whether he can emerge as The Black Flamingo. So, the thing I took from the blurb was that it was a story about fighting to be able to live as who you really are, with no fear.

The very first thing I noticed about this book is that it isn’t written in traditional prose. It doesn’t use the regular paragraph format, and often has different formats on different pages which was something quite refreshing to see, because it made each page its own thing. And it’s one of those things that, when I think about it, it’s quite a smart choice, because since this is a book about fighting to live as who you are, that often comes in the territory of not fitting into that “normal” white, cishet box. So, it does make sense that the pages look the way that they do. It’s fighting in its own way and saying that it’s not going to be formatted normally. There are also little illustrations on some of the pages, and well as some of them being black.

The book opens by saying our black flamingo, Michael Brown, was born a bad egg and without complete love, but we find out that’s because their father walked out on them. For their sixth birthday they said they wanted one thing – a barbie – but they don’t get it. And maybe it was because I relate to the young queer kid, when he didn’t get it, I was disappointed for him. But his mum says they didn’t think he were serious, but if he was, he’ll get one for Christmas, and he does. Now tell me why that made me so emotional?

His mum was so sweet as well, as much as she could be, because she gives him this speech on, page 35, where she tells him, when he’s eight, never to let people tell him he is half anything, because he is a full human.

And it’s odd, because this book follows Michael as he grows up from being a child to when he’s at university. We get to see his mum’s boyfriend basically, and then Michael’s opinion of him immediately changes. Like, originally Michael thought the boyfriend’s car was cool, but when he stopped coming around, the car became stupid. Oh, you can also tell pretty earlier on that Michael isn’t going to turn out straight. He plays kiss chase, never kissing the girls. He plays husband and wife with the boys but plays the wife.

There’s this point when he’s in high school where he’s reading in a library with this girl, Daisy, he says that when he reads books, he gets lost and loses where he is, but doesn’t get that when he reads poetry – specifically Maya Angelou is mentioned – so I’m wondering if that’s another reason why this book was formatted like this. Like, the format is very poetic, and if Michael can make sense of poetry, it makes a lot of sense why the book is, for the most part, formatted like poetry.

As part of seeing Michael growing up, there was this moment in school where Michael plucked up the courage to tell this guy that he liked that he liked him. And, I mean, power to Michael there, because I would have never been able to do that in high school – in part to the fact I didn’t know I was queer yet – but besties, the confidence. I wish I had his. And when Michael told the boy he liked him, ooh, it was every bit as awkward as I hoped it would be, because you know that’s just how teenagers are.

Then he keeps growing up, as people often do, and the bad things start getting worse in a way that he starts to understand that the bad things are in fact bad. He maybe makes a bad choice or two, that I’m not going to spoil. But then he also gets to university, and even though his mum gave him that speech of never letting people tell him he’s not a whole person, he says that he doesn’t feel black enough for the African Caribbean Society, not Greek enough for the Hellenic Society, and not queer enough for the LGBT Society. In all of this, he ends up joining the Drag Society. As to not really spoil anything, I’ll leave that point there.

This book is all about the self, there’s a poem right at the end of the book titled “How to Come Out”. And I thought it was lovely and real, saying that you don’t have to come out unless you want to. It was nice to see coming out rounded off as just this thing that’s a part of your queer existence. I have no issue with books and stories that make coming out a big deal, because for some people it is. But to see it addressed as just something on the way of finding out who you are… it was nice, because that’s how mine went.

So, I really liked this book – more than I expected to. I don’t know what it was I was expecting when I got it, but I’m glad I finally read it.

Okay, bye!